This grandson turned 2 over the summer.
When I was eight, I thought being a grandmother would make me really decrepit.
I also thought I would know more by the time I was a Nana. Oh, I have more useless knowledge in my head, but I really expected to be wiser by the time I was this decrepit. I’m wiser than age eight, but sometimes I still feel only twelve. Do we ever really grow up? (Author Leo Buscaglia said we don’t – we just get taller.)
Oprah writes in her magazine (soon to be digital-only) every month “The thing I know for sure….” and then she adds some life lesson she’s gained in her 50+ years.
From my now decrepit point of view, here are 2 dozen things I know for sure….
1. Grandchildren are the most wonderful, perfect gift you can receive.
2. I should have appreciated my slender frame when I was 20, instead of thinking I was fat.
3. It was very beneficial growing up with a special-needs brother. I like to think I’m more compassionate because of it.
4. Never have a squirrel monkey as a pet. They’re stinky and mean.
5. When you’re feeling insecure for whatever reason, thinking the world is watching you and judging – relax. Nobody cares. People are focused on their own insecurities, thinking the world is watching them and judging. It’s really silly.
6. Trouble always starts out fun.
7. Dark chocolate is better than milk chocolate. (Note: White chocolate is not really chocolate. It’s cocoa butter (no cocoa), sugar and milk, and it’s greasy and yucky. It does not even deserve the title ‘chocolate.’ It should be called ‘white sugar grease.’)
8. Be nice to cashiers and waiter/waitresses, no matter what. They deal with rude customers more than anyone else on the planet.
9. When extra money comes your way, almost immediately, a major appliance will die, the car will need a new transmission, surgery will be needed, or an asteroid will fall on your house.
10. Black cohosh with clover really does minimize hot flashes.
11. As soon as you find a great product you love, the manufacturer will change it, or stop making it. Buy 5 of that item you love.
12. Caring for a dying parent is heart-breaking, but it’s not about you. Even though it’s hard, it’s sacred, valuable work, and God is watching.
13. When guests are coming for dinner, always make dessert first. If your company cancels, you still have dessert. 🙂
14. Sugar is a charming, seductive demon.
15. Gardening is harder and sweatier than it looks. Even if you think it looks hard and sweaty, it’s harder and sweatier than that.
16. There will come a point in life when your doctor is younger than you. This is very weird.
17. These are the best brownies it the world. (They are charming and seductive.) I’ve tried them all, and I know. (There is one essential: they are best baked in the Baker’s Edge pan – shown in this link; it produces the correct thickness, as well as edges on every brownie.)
18. People do the best they can with what they know at the time.
19. That size 10 dress you’re saving, hoping you’ll get back into it someday? Take it to the thrift shop. If you ever reach size 10 again, trust me, you’ll buy a new dress.
20. Learn to forgive. Do whatever it takes to get there because a bitter heart contaminates everyone around you. (It helps to remember you’ve hurt people too.)
21. Pray for those you love. Even if nothing changes in their lives, you will gain God’s perspective, and this alone can bring you peace.
22. Thinking ahead is the number one skill we should learn in high school. If our immature brain could grasp this…many mistakes would be avoided.
23. For the most part, you can’t tell your mom what to do. Well, you can, but she won’t listen.
24. No matter what you’re looking for in your purse, it’s always at the bottom.
I wonder if Oprah knows all this cool stuff.